This was written by my mom and her twin when they were in the Prime of their mothering:)

(This is very long, but I wanted it so it would print in my blog book)

A YEAR IN THE LIFE OF TEENAGERS AND THEIR FUNNY, FUNNY, MOTHERS

(by Jennifer Marti and Win Hulbert)

See Mother. See Mother laugh. Mother is happy.

Mother is happy about a new school year for her child.

Mother has many plans for free time while child is at school. Mother has plans for journal writing, updating baby books, meal planning etc. Mother is organized. Mother smiles all the time. Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother. See Mother smile. Mother is happy. The school shopping is all done. Hear the children add new school items to the school supply list. See Mother write another check for more school supplies. See mother write check for school pictures. See Mother search the town for the “right” kind of paper. See Mother search the town for a Science Calculator. See Mother send more money for P.E. uniform and lock. See Mother write another check for team uniform. Look! Look! Mother is not smiling. Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother. See Mother drive. See Mother drive to school with the child who missed the bus. See Mother drive to school with forgotten paper, with forgotten book, with forgotten lunch, with forgotten cheerleading briefs. See Mother drive to Early Morning Seminary. See Mother drive to soccer practice, to baseball practice, to basketball practice, to volleyball practice, to cheerleading practice. Does Mother need practice? See Mother drive child to and from work. Go, Mother go. See Mother drive child to dance class, to piano lesson and to the Saturday Night Dance. See child drive Mother – crazy! Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother make nutritious lunches. See Mother make nutritious snacks. See Mother hide sweet “I Love You” note in lunch sack. See child trade lunch at noon. Funny, funny Mother.

Watch Mother referee fights about who wore it last, whose turn it is, who didn’t do it and who did do it. Watch her listen to: “I didn’t, it wasn’t me”, “Why do I have to, it’s not my turn?”, What is there to eat?”, “Can I have a sleep-over?”, “Can I use the car?”, “Why do we have to do this?”, “This is so stupid!”, “Can you take my friend home because her parents can’t?”, “You’re mean!....but, will you take me to the mall?” See Mother open truancy notice and hear her child say “It wasn’t my fault, it wasn’t REALLY WRONG!” See Mother put away her journal until next year. Funny, funny Mother.

Watch Mother sort the piles of laundry. Watch Mother clean the house. Watch Mother put another load of laundry into the washer. Watch Mother make chore chart for all her children. Watch Mother clean the house by herself. Watch Mother shut the child’s bedroom door so she doesn’t have to look at it. Funny, funny Mother.

Watch Mother search for and find her new blouse in the bottom of daughter’s closet…dirty. See daughter borrow all of Mother’s nylons. See Mother wear the nylons with the run in it. See Mother helping daughter fix her hair. Hear daughter complaining it’s too tight, too loose, it has a bump in it or it looks dumb. See daughter crying. See Mother hit daughter on head with comb and say, “ Do it yourself then!” See daughter miss the bus. See Mother drive late daughter to school again. See Mother’s beauty salon open again at 10:00 p.m. for trims, cuts, and perms. Funny, funny Mother.

Hear Mother say, “It’s time to get up for the paper route”. See Mother wake child up again for the paper route. See Mother drive child through the paper route in the car. Mother’s only friend is the car. Hear Mother remind child to collect. Hear Mother yell. Watch Mother pay the bill. Funny, funny Mother.

Hear Mother say, “Get off the phone please.” Hear Mother say, “You have 5 minutes to get off the phone.” Hear Mother count to 3. See Mother unplugging the phone. See Mother hiding the phone. Hear Mother reminding child to clean room. Hear Mother ask when lawn will be mowed. Hear Mother remind child to practice. Hear Mother say, “Go to bed.” Hear Mother say, “Go to bed.” Hear Mother say, “I am going to bed.” Hear Mother ask if tithing is paid, prayers are said and reminding again that it’s Fast Sunday. Hear Mother say, “Turn the T.V. off.” Hear Mother say, “Turn the Nintendo off.” See Mother hide the Nintendo games. See Mother forget where she hid the Nintendo games. Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother give children dog for Christmas to teach them responsibility. Hear children argue about its name. See Mother assign pet chores for feeding, walking and poop scooping. See Mother drag 50 lbs of dog food through the store. See dog destroy backyard and chew up 5 hoses. See dog steal neighbor’s newspaper. See Mother take dog to the Vet and spend hundreds of dollars. See dog follow child to school. See Mother chase dog (in heals) even though she is late for work. See Mother help dog deliver 11 puppies. See Mother scoop poop. Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother sitting for five hours at City Track Meet. See Mother listening to another concert. See Mother watching another basketball game and recital. See Mother go to the grocery store again. See Mother buy $300 worth of food and hear child say, “There’s nothing to eat, why don’t you buy something good.” See child take all of Mother’s change and gum. See Mother buy another pair of tennis shoes and more white socks. See Mother buy contact replacements and braces. See Mother buy endless bottles of shampoo, hairspray, conditioners, deodorant, toothpaste, toilet paper, bake sale ingredients and birthday presents for child’s friends. Funny, funny Mother.

Hear Mother calling children to early morning scripture reading. See Mother sitting alone. See daughter braiding friend’s hair during scripture reading. See Mother reading scriptures to child while he gulps down his breakfast. Look! Look! Mother is sewing dance and drill team costumes. Mother is sewing Easter dresses and prom gowns. Mother is mending jeans for the 6^th time. Mother is buying a different prom gown. See child cut up jeans anyway to make shorts. See Mother helping child devise elaborate plan for asking date to the prom. See Mother helping child devise elaborate plan for answering date to the prom. See Mother waiting up for child after the prom. See Mother waiting up some more. See Mother waiting up longer. See child coming in after curfew. Hear child trying to explain. Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother helping child with term paper. See Mother typing term paper. See Mother driving to Kinkos at midnight to make copies. See Mother tear up her organized plans. Hear Mother reminding child to take SAT and ACT tests. Hear Mother remind child to fill out college and scholarship applications. Hear Mother calling college for a slight chance her child might be admitted even though application is late. See Mother get the hives. See far-away look in Mother’s eyes. Mother is disorganized. Mother is disoriented. Funny, funny Mother.

See Mother prepare for graduation. See Mother buy senior pictures. See Mother rent cap and gown. See Mother buy graduation gifts. Hear Mother say it was a great year. See child look for Mother in audience. See Mother fill with pride. Hear Mother say, “I Love You.” See Mother cry. Funny, funny Mother.